Va-Jay-Jay Friday: 5 Things You Didn’t Know About Your Vagina

Anyone who knows me, knows that it is hard to believe I am talking about vagina’s, let alone talking about them every Friday, but fact is, there is so much we need to know about our “girl.” It hurts my feelings to know there are so many women who are clueless about their va-jay-jay’s, there needs to be more information and I intend to give it to you.

1. Only 30% of women orgasm from intercourse. Shocker!!! The clitoris has all the fun. We have over 6,000 nerve endings in that one little piece of flesh. Thank goodness. It is that sweet spot that allows sexual stimulation in addition to intercourse. You are probably thinking, “What about the G-Spot?” Well, come to find out, the G Spot is merely an extension of the C Spot. It is the internal side of it.

2. Ejaculation vs. Squirting. Not every woman ejaculates or squirts and that is perfectly normal. When a woman ejaculates, a small amount of milky discharge comes out during sexual arousal. On the other hand, a woman who squirts is essentially peeing. That’s right, it’s piss! So, I know that most guys love a girl that can squirt, but it is mostly, if not entirely urine. Surprise!!!

3. Kegel Exercises. Ladies, the best part about having a va-jay-jay is that we can work it out and keep it tight. It is like any other muscle, a little squeeze and release can go a long way. Even better, you can do it anytime, anywhere. If you need a little assistance, there are many products on the market that will give you a little edge. My personal favorite is the Jade Kegel Egg. Just insert and go!

4. Natural Cleaning Process. The vagina is a self cleaning oven. While there are a million and one products out there to “clean” out Ladyflower, the best one is simply water. See my previous Va-Jay-Jay Friday post about Waterworks!

5. Your vagina can fall out. I was a little shocked when I first heard this. You mean to tell me that my Va-Jay-Jay can come out of me? Yes, that’s right… the structure that holds your vagina in place can actually fall apart, called vaginal prolapse, causing you “stuff” to hang outside of your body. Imagine a tube sock turned inside out. Only good news is that your doctor can put you back together again.

This has been a rather interesting read, wouldn’t you say? Studies show, the more confident you are about your vagina and what’s going on with it, the better orgasms you will have. So read up. I guess it is like anything else, once you have freedom of mind, you can let go of uncertainties and let loose, literally. Learn all that you can about your va-jay-jay and then have fun with it.

Toodles.

Amber Rose Has a Ring On It!

Wiz Khalifa has officially asked his long time girlfriend, Amber Rose, to marry him. She said YES!!

I wonder if Amber will take notes from Evelyn Lozada and officially open the relationship? Whatever they choose, I wish them well.

That rock looks rather large too, go Am!

How To Lose 10 Pounds in 10 Days

I know you are wondering if the title of this post is true, and yes, it is very true! You can actually lose 10 whole pounds in 10 short days!! I am not about to sell you on the latest diet food or tell you to run 50 miles across the state of Illinois. Without killing yourself, there is quite a simple way to start shedding those unwanted pounds- and fast.

Lately, I have been on this journey to use as many healthy alternatives in my daily routine. As a result, I have noticed the side effects of some of them and I want to share them with you.

Tip #1:

This should be a no-brainer, but the more I preach this, the less people listen. Drink plenty of water! My rule of thumb is approximately 3 liters. Here’s what you do. At night, before you lie down, make sure you have a bottle of water beside the bed. When you wake up, before you brush you teeth and wash your face, make sure you drink that bottle of water. It should at least be a half liter. Then throughout the day, intake the other 2.5 liters of water. One way you can do this is by drinking a glass of water before each meal, which will make you fuller and as a result, you will take in less food. The reason water is so helpful is because it gets your bowels moving and does not allow the gunk to sit on your stomach.

For an extra boost, I recommend dropping 1 to 2 tablespoons of Bragg’s Organic Apple Cider Vinegar into 8 to 16 oz. of water. It helps rid toxins, regulate you pH and gives a jolt of energy.

Tip #2:

Exercise. Now I know I promised I would not have you running a marathon, but… you do need some exercise. You can do this by taking the stairs at work, doing jumping jacks while your favorite TV show is on, or even going to the gym for 45 mins to “sweat it out.” These are minor adjustments, but extremely doable. If you are serious about dumping these pounds fast, you need to get your body moving.

Tip #3:

Eat more meals, smaller portions. We have all heard this before, but yet we ignore the benefits of actually implementing it into our daily practice. As I said in tip #1, drink a glass of water before each meal. Once you do that, you will be less likely to want to stuff yourself so much, which is perfect since you should only be eating half of what most American’s ingest in a single meal anyway. Eat smaller meals and snack on nuts, raisins, and organic juices between meals. You should be eating about 6 times a day (meals plus snacks). Trust me, this works and you will not have that urge to eat a cow by the time you get home from work.

Tip#4:

Again, these are tips for losing 10 pounds in 10 days, so I must share this tip/ trick with you. It is not permanent, but it will help you obtain that weight loss goal for that pool party you want to go to, or wedding dress you need to squeeze into. Years ago when I modeled I had tricks I’d use to make sure my stomach looked amazing in photos. One of those tricks was the use of Preparation H and Saran Wrap. I’d slather the Preparation all over my belly and use the wrap to seal it in. I know that sounds funny, but because Preparation H is used to shrink hemorrhoids (fat), I knew it would do the same on my waistline. Read my previous post to see how this is done!

Hope these tips get you on the right path to weight loss. Spring and Summer is right around the corner, let’s start now!

Open Relationship, What?

Was it me, or did we all hear Evelyn openly tell Chad it was ok to cheat once they were married as long as she knew first hand? Like Tamar Braxton would say, “Wha Wha Wha Whaaat?” I could hardly believe it. Is this what relationships, more importantly, marriages are becoming? I am not knocking anyone who decides to have an open relationship. I mean, it isn’t for me, but a relationship is not a marriage. Isn’t opening your marriage the complete opposite of what a marriage represents? Webster’s definition of marriage states: the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law. Keyword, “a,” meaning a single man or a single woman!

Are we becoming so brain washed by society and “reality” TV that we are overlooking the important things in a union? Sure it looks fabulous to see Ev sporting the latest LB’s and it is cool to see Chad buy her the coolest car on the lot, but at what cost are you willing to pay for these things? Infidelity? Is there some sort of rule that tells women if they do not have a serious, committed relationship by 35 to take the highest bidder? I’m confused. When did this become ok? And the fact that she was not happy to have to tell Chad to “keep it real with her,” only confirmed in my head that she is merely settling?! Really Girl?

As they say, you can’t knock it ’til you try it, but since that isn’t in my future plans I’m going to have to rely on the accounts of Jada Pinkett-Smith, Emily B, and Karrueche. Doesn’t seem like a picnic to me, hmmm. This raises another issue; if your mate cheats, do you leave or stay? You maybe surprised at what I’d have to say about that, but check back to see what I think.

What are your thoughts on an open marriage?

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Makeup Talk with Dee Marie

Ladies, most of us love our makeup…. gotta beat that face. Meet Dee Marie, my friend and all so talented makeup artist!

Tell me a little bit about Dee Marie and how you got your start in makeup.

Dee Marie (Deadra Barnett) is an up and coming makeup artist based in the DC area. I got my start in makeup about 6 years ago in my hometown of Los Angeles, where beauty and fashion is rampant. I had the opportunity the draw inspiration from just about anywhere. The first company to ever hire me as an artist was Bobbi Brown, and then I eventually moved on to be a MAC girl where I received the bulk of my experience and training.

As a makeup artist, what is the #1 mistake women make with cosmetics?

The number one mistake women make when using makeup, is not knowing their own skin type i.e. texture (are you dry, oily, or combination?). I always ask my clients to, “Tell me a little about your skin” in order to assess what products to use. The perfect makeup look is never complete without flawless skin!

What is the single best piece of advice you could give someone who is new to applying makeup?

Word of advice to women who are new to applying makeup is, “Start off with a little, then build up.” You can always apply more shadow or blush, but it’s harder to take away. Also, invest in some great brushes because they will help guide you while you’re applying, and insure that you’ll get the best finish.

What three makeup items should no woman leave home without?

The three items that I never leave home without is:

• Mac “spiked” brow pencil, because a fierce brow frames the face
• Urban Decay “Baked” Bronzer
• NYX Mega Shine Lip Gloss in “La La”

I personally love mascara. Which mascara would you recommend for volume and length?

I am a big mascara lover and have always made it my mission to try out as many types of mascaras as possible. I have a love/hate relationship with (some) drugstore products, but when it comes to mascara they have it on lock! I’m in love with Rimmel London’s “Lash Accelerator” because it gives great length and doesn’t clump.

If you could work with any celebrity, who would it be?

If I had the pleasure to work with any celebrity, it would be (hands down) Kim Kardashian. Yes, I know we are all a little turned off by her “celebrity”, but let’s be honest, Home girl is DROP DEAD GORGEOUS! Her bone structure is to die for, and I love how she seems open to playing with different looks. She has definitely become a makeup icon in my book and her makeup artist Mario is such an innovator.

Excellent tips, I’m headed to Nordy’s right now!

I’d like to thank Dee for taking time out of her schedule to talk to little ol’ me! Ladies, Dee is one of the best and to see more of Dee Marie visit her page on Facebook or tweet her on Twitter!

Ciao!

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Men Who Gossip

There is nothing worse than a man who gossips. Let’s face it, women talk, but we kind of expect that. When a man runs his mouth, he looks a little like.. well, a b!t*h! Sorry!

This weekend I was minding my business when I received a phone call that apparently I was involved in some sexual activity that involved my best girlfriend and some NFL players. I laugh. This LIE could not be further from the truth, but the bottom line is that although I cannot control what another person says, I certainly can address the issue as a whole.

The problem is not the rumor. People are going to talk and when they talk about you it simple means you are important to them. The issue, however, is the fact that someone had the audacity to not only spread a rumor that was merely hearsay (how high school), but then vouch for this rumor as if he were in affiliation with my va-jay-jay. I mean really, how can someone know so much about what I supposedly did unless they were physically involved? Get a friggin’ life! I am never one to toot my own horn, but obviously some people can’t take their eyes off of me. I’m just saying!

Men who gossip are less than men if you ask me. In fact, I should have included this on my “Never Trust a Man Who” post! While it is alright to inform your boys of something they you have heard, it is another thing to co-sign it unless you are the source. Men, don’t do this. Be man enough to keep your lips closed and only speak on truths. I could certainly go into further detail about this, but the moral of the story is, if you gossip… stop it. If you’re a “man” that gossips, go get a sex change you girly-man!

“Believe none of what you hear and half of what you see.”

First Date Advice

How many of us have been on a first date, be it through online dating sites or the old fashion way? *raises hand* Yea, just what I thought…. every last one of us. When it comes to first dates, there proper ways of divulging information, but better yet, is it necessary to even go there?

I find it difficult to predict the tone of a first date. Some first dates leave you feeling confused, others will have your head in the clouds… and some, well… they just suck ass. For those of us who have had a sucky first date, you can probably agree with me of some of the first date no-no’s:

1. Don’t take yourself too serious. Come on, get over yourself. No one goes on a date to be interviewed or judged. Just laugh, talk, and have a good time.
2. Don’t talk about children, your children. Now don’t go yelling at the computer screen, I am not saying that you cannot mention your children, in fact, I definitely receommend you tell your date that you have kids. But what I am saying is that you do not need to go into details. I am sorry, but people do not want to hear about your daycare bills and baby mama drama on the first date.
3. Don’t talk excessively. I must admit, I am kind of guilty of this. Once you get me going, I can take a conversation and run with it, but it is a terrible idea to talk excessively on the first date. You should be getting to know one another. If one person dominates, the other person will get bored or feel like you’re self-absorbed.
4. Don’t be on your cell phone too much. “Hello jerkoff, I am sitting here waiting to talk to you!” Please don’t take too much time looking at Instagram or updating your Facebook status… the date is about 2 people, not your whole social network. Who cares what your friends are doing, you have “opportunities” sitting in front of you.
5. Don’t talk about your Ex. Your ex is your ex for a reason so do NOT talk about your ex on a first date, or period unless asked. That’s total bull that you would think it is alright to carry on a conversation about how good or bad he/she was. “I don’t care and I was hoping you didn’t either.” Do this and you are probably almost certainly not going to get a second date.

Read these steps thoroughly and I am sure your first date will go just fine, in fact, you may even get that kiss you want!

How to Look Comfy-Cute

To my ladies on-the-go, the secret to looking discreetly delicious is quite easy, but let me say… not quite as simple as tossing on old scrubs and a VCU sweatshirt. Although being understated takes little effort, it does take some effort. For me, I find myself in my favorite stretch pants or jeans, hair pulled back into a nice ponytail, and a slightly over-sized sweater grazing my buttock! And in case you are wondering, this look is easy to change up with a simple change of cardigan or shoe. See below how I simply changed my boots and sweater.

Quick, easy, and extremely comfortable! What on-the-go mom or student in a rush couldn’t benefit from such a put together, yet, carefree look? And for those of you who cringe at the idea of taking the time to do your makeup, let me assure you, on most days it takes me less than 5 minutes to do mine. Determine your best feature, mine are my eyes, so I always line them up and apply a little mascara. Next I wisp on a bronzer to warm up my cheeks and lastly apply a little tinted gloss or chap stick to complete my look.

Movie star sunglasses always gives your look a more polished effect, but they aren’t necessary.

Tips to fast, get your butt out of the house, looks:

1. Make sure you always have black t-shirts, tank tops, and leggings on hand. They are always a great base for a fast, put together look.
2. Invest a little money in some cardigans (which you can use for work as well) and comfy (but cute) sweaters or tee’s (for the warmer months).
3. Be sure to have a go-to hair style for those days when you need to get up and move. Mine is a messy bun or pony tail, some of my readers may even appreciate me including the idea of throwing on a wig.
   
4. Have a makeup regimen that takes no longer than 5 minutes to apply. This is easy to do: As I said before, determine your most prominent feature. If it is your lips (for example), make sure you always apply a gloss, lipstick, or lip conditioner. Then, if time permits, tackle your eyes and/or cheeks.
   
5. Last, but not least, accessorize a little. Sunglasses or nice earrings will do the trick!

Viola. Hope this helps ladies!

Va-Jay-Jay- Friday: 32 Names for Our Lovely "Lady"

I started terming the name Va-Jay-Jay Friday on my blog! I thought, if it is good enough for Oprah, well…. it is good enough for me darn it! “Oh Oprah, you just had to coin a term so appropriate, Va-Jay-Jay!” Anyway, I recently had a couple of people comment on it *rolls eyes*, which compelled me to do a little research on the multitude of other names there must be out there that refers to our Southern Region!

Read the list below, you’ll probably find it pretty funny or maybe a tad disturbing, but nonetheless, not more fitting than the name I chose for my readers!

When Discussing Female Health Matters With Your Gyno or Parents:

• Business
• Privates
• Patsy
• Nether Regions
• Vagina (duh!)

In The Midst Of Exciting Sex:

• Snatch
• Kitty
• Yoni
• Punani
• Pu**y (eeekk)
• Coochie
• Nookie

Just, You Know, Shooting The Breeze With Your Girls:

• Va-jay-jay (Heather likes this!)
• Britney
• Cooter
• Hoo-ha
• Coozie
• Box

If You’re Feeling Romantic:

• Rosebud
• Sugar Basin
• Love Tunnel
• Lady Flower
• Oracle
• Nonny-no (huh?)
• Love Glove

Just Plain Wrong:

• Pink Taco
• Clam
• Beef Curtains
• Hair Pie
• Sperm Bank
• Cunt
• Twat

Did You Say BJ?

You will not believe the slew of information I hear on a daily basis; from sibling rivalries, to people’s most inner thoughts about life, career, and finances, to the silliest of jokes. I suppose I am a person people feel they can talk to. Well I was talking to my friend and he quoted some joke about a man wanting to have sex with his wife. I thought it was pretty funny, read below:

One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on

the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says: “I’m

sorry honey, I’ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to

stay fresh.”

The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he

rolls back over and taps his wife again. This time he whispers in her ear:

“Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?”

Haha. Clever.

This joke got me to thinking about the obvious, giving head (aka blowjobs)… duh! So let’s talk about that. First of all, is it me or is it a common misconception that black women are less likely to do oral than white women nowadays? I hear so many comedians laugh about a “sista” not wanting to mess up her hair, or her only giving her man oral attention once a year, on his birthday. Really? Personally, I do not see the big deal. If you are in a relationship with your husband (especially) or boyfriend, wouldn’t you want to do that? Fill me in ladies, maybe I am missing something.

Perhaps, I am forgetting that once you are married or in a committed relationship for so long, you began to lose the desire to do the things you once did. Maybe it becomes mundane and boring, but ladies, we can’t allow that. You want your man to always be fully satisfied with you and vice versa. No one, white, black, tall or short should entice your man in such a way that makes him drool over the idea of getting his needs met elsewhere. So I guess what I am saying is that, if you are one of the “sistas” out here not willing to do a little “something” for her man, you may need to look up some classes and learn some new tricks (yes, they have those). Maybe you just aren’t doing it right!

DISCLAIMER: This post is intended to motivate and promote fun and safe sex between committed partners. Please do not misconstrue the content of this post.